An Evening of Prayers

I came home after a rotten day at work, I didn’t really have anything to take my frustrations out on so, I chose my glasses.  They were dirty.  A bit crooked and I could barely see through them.  This simple thing finally sent me over the edge.  I know, glasses right? 

I opened up my back door, walked out on the deck, took my glasses off and threw them as hard as I could out in the yard.  Satisfied that the glasses would no longer be bothering me, I turned and walked back inside, slamming the door on my way in.

I made a pot of coffee, which seems to always settle my nerves a bit.  Not making the coffee, drinking the coffee. Oh and Yeah.  Throwing the glasses didn’t really solve anything.  In fact, as I was making the coffee, I could see another problem arising.  But, I managed to get the coffee going and made my way to the living room and plopped down on the couch.

I turned on the TV to the news or something, can’t quite remember what it was and after a few minutes of relaxing, hearing the coffee gurgling in the kitchen it’s aroma wafting through the house, I started to realize what I had done.  I had basically just took $300.00 and thrown it out the door for no apparent reason and now, I had no glasses and I still had the same problems I had before.

I made my way back to the kitchen and fixed a cup of coffee.  Came back to the living room, set the coffee down on my table, turned the TV off and I knelt down at my couch.  I then started to pray.

I asked for God to please bring my glasses back in.  After about an hour of praying God never answered my prayers.  He just didn’t care enough about me to bring my glasses in.  I finally gave up and decided to go out and look for them myself.

As I went through the back door, I managed to pray to God to help me find my glasses and it wasn’t long before He answered that prayers.  He found them where I threw them.

WAIT WAIT!  No,No, No…I’m kidding!  None of that story is true at all.  But, how many similar stories have we heard?  What do you think when you hear them?  Both are a bit far fetched you think?  Is there a happy medium?  I have my opinions but I’m really more interested in yours.

I know that you will not have a relationship with God if you do not pray to Him, talk to Him.  No relationship is built without communication, so please don’t take this post to say that I don’t think God answer’s prayers.  If you get that feeling, read some of my previous posts, k. 

Please don’t hurt me :)

Because of HIM

SC

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Nothing Removed From The Plate

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To say that I was worthless prior to the 1:00 appointment would be quite the understatement.  Work, friends, and let’s face it, pretty much everything had taken a back seat to the worry and dread.

The drive, which took approximately an hour, was horrible.  The closer I got to the destination, the more nervous and tense I became.  My stomach hurt.  My legs were getting numb.  And to top it off, all the extra tenseness threw my back into a fit of rage. 

I tried to listen to a podcast or two to take my mind off things, but eventually just had to turn the noise off completely.  I wasn’t really hearing anything anyway. 

A couple of tweets here and there, and a couple of IM’s here and there netted some much needed encouragement which really helped a lot.  More than I will ever be able to repay.  I appreciate all who helped get me there in one piece.  I appreciate all the extra prayers that you guys said on my behalf.

I must admit, I have been pretty selfish in my prayers today.  I have talked to God mostly about me today, but not so much just about what I want.  No.  Though they are my kids while here on earth, I made sure to keep my selfish desires out of this and remind myself through our talks that ultimately it’s God’s will that will be done. 

I arrived about 15 or 20 minutes early.  Walked into the lawyers office where the mediation would be taking place and there sat the ex and her present husband.  All that was left now was to wait for the lawyers.

Fifteen minutes later, my lawyer walked through the door and we went back to our room to prepare for the mediation.  Her lawyer still hadn’t showed yet. 

Thirty minutes later (1:30, 30 minutes after the meeting was to start) her lawyer still hadn’t showed and the person in charge of the meeting came in to inform us that he was going to be late, still.  UGH!

My lawyer and I sat for another 5 minutes before deciding to reschedule. 

The drive home I think was worse.  Emotionally drained.  Mentally exhausted.  But not once did I ask God why.  I know he’s got a plan.  We’ll just have to see what it is next time.

Because of HIM

SC

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Still Room on the Plate

Plate0001Been praying a lot today for what is coming up soon. Real soon.  Like, in about 13.5 hours from the time of this writing. 

Though I’ve known the day was coming, the reality of it hasn’t really set in until today.  Nervousness, fear, doubt, wonder.  All of those emotions barged in uninvited to my day and have made themselves at home.  I’ve asked them to go away, to no avail.

You see, tomorrow is mediation day.  My lawyer and I.  My ex-wife’s lawyer and her. A mediator between us. Trying to come up with a different custody plan with the kids.  The way I understand it, we won’t be in the same room together which is a definitely a plus.   If all goes well tomorrow we can keep this (and the kids) 0ut of court.  I’ve just got to be a bit stronger than I have been in the past with her. 

Keep me in your thoughts and prayers.

Because of HIM

SC

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