Questioning Along My Way

By Scott | April 21, 2009

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“I’m going to move forward with the crazy thought that I’ve had in my head of becoming a professional counselor.” – me

“Making action more of a necessity.” – me (in reference to fixing past mistakes)

“This may not be a milestone but on February 25th I am going to give up another vice of mine. Smoking. ” – me

“I’m wanting to do it to fill a hunger.” – yep, me

Look at all those “things I’m gonna do” items up there that I have written about in the past. Many of them were items that I felt God was wanting me to do. Do you know how many of them I have done? I’ll give you a hint, it’s a round number.

When I wrote those things in my posts, I was as sure of doing those as one could be. Today as I look back and think about each one individually, I still have a “want” to do those things. It’s just that the deep emotional ties to each seems to have dissipated.

Where does that tie go? Were they really ideas set in motion by God, or some crazy notion that my mind had come up with on it’s own? Is there a set amount of time that we have to act on ideas before they become reality?

When I wrote them, I wasn’t writing them to be self-righteous, or to seem bigger than I really am. I wasn’t writing them to get an atta boy from you guys. I felt very strongly about each one. I felt a need to accomplish each one.

Am I lazy? Am I being led astray by thoughts, not of God, but of man? I’m confused, for sure. It’s this area in my life that brings back memories of the old drunken me that would say I was going to do something, then not even think about it any more.

Needless to say, Iwill be praying for direction and clarity. I would like your prayers as well, as I go about questioning along my way.

Because of HIM