A lot has changed since I started The Ever-Changing Thought.  I initially wanted to use this blog as a place for folks like myself who are having issues with addiction to come and see that they are not alone. A place to turn to see how one person battles his addiction everyday of the rest of his life. 

Because of HIM

This medicine thing is beating me up.  I’m tired all of the time.  I’m in very somber moods.  Cheer is not a word in my current vocabulary.  Wait, I just used it.  So maybe it is

I’ve so many thoughts and ideas come to me to blog about.  By the time I sit to write them out, the desire and the words often leave me.  So, I haven’t been writing as often.  Sorry.  I’m not writing the ideas down as they come to me, so I’m sure most will just fall away into the void.

I sit here and I blame it all on the medication.  It’s convenient.  It’s easy to do that.  I also think it’s the truth.

I’m not worried about taking the pills.  I’m not worried (well maybe a little) about getting addicted to them.  I’m under God’s care and the doctor’s care (I’ve told several of you guys/gals that) and everything will be OK as far as the addiction goes.  Not to mention, the way they make feel, yuck.  I can hardly wait until I can stop them completely.

Life has dealt me a blow that I was not expecting.  If it’s a test, I will pass.  Wasn’t long ago that I couldn’t, wouldn’t, say that.  I would fail miserably and drown away my feelings with an ice cold bud light.  I thank God daily, that doesn’t come to me as an option.

I will always come back to HIM.  Without HIM I’m nothing.

I’m here.  I’m reading you guys’ and gals’ blogs.  I’m just being quiet.  I’m not the me I was not so long ago.  I’m not really liking me.  This me.  Hopefully, sometime this month I can get back to some kind of normalcy.  I go to the pain management Dr.  Maybe he can do something to get me off this mess for a while.

Until then, you are welcome to hang around.  Not sure for what.  Just, take this post as an apology for Scott not being here

Because of HIM

SC

Aheemmm….*TAP* *TAP* *TAP*….Testing, Testing….Is this thing on?!?….Oh..Hey!

Just making sure I remember how to do this.  Missed hanging around here and hearing from you guys.  My keyboard still works, mouse..check.  Hmm..do I have anything to write about?  Yeah.  With these thoughts, there is always something to write about.

I’ve left the door open here, so come on in. Hang out.  I’ll be back later tonight with another thought that I’ve had about my adventure in rehab.  A very interesting thought where I question, why was I really SENT to rehab.

See you later!

Because of HIM

SC

I can see it thru yonder distance….blech, I’m not good a poetry.  I’ll spare us the misery (which is a really good book by the way).

The new year is upon us.  As I get older it seems that years don’t really take a year to pass.  Especially this year!  Man (or woman, whatever the case may be) What A Year!  If it’s a sign of things to come then good grief I don’t know if I can handle it.

I’m so excited about bringing in the new year without having to count down to make sure I take a drink of alcohol right when the clock changes over to 12:00am.  Nothing like starting the New Year drunk/drinking.  Then starting the first day hungover and sleeping most of it away.  I’m so glad there isn’t anything like it.

I’ve only a couple of resolutions this year.  I’m not really a goal-oriented person with enough discipline to really set long-term goals.  The 2 that I’ve decided on are important to me, as “resolutions” should be to all of us.

1. Build my relationship with God.  Try to determine if everything I am doing is his will.  What is his will?  Not that I will find the end-all answer, but I’m going to try and get a better handle on finding/determining God’s will in my life.

2.  Stop Smoking – Ugh.  I dread it. But my thoughts are, if I succeed in the first, the second will be easier.

The first may also take this blog to a different place.  I’ve been struggling, not wanting to lose you guys.  At this point, I have a faint notion of this year, taking The Ever-Changing Thought to a more…um…spiritual thought.  After all, God is the center of everything I’m trying to make of myself..er…everything He is trying to make of myself.  I think he deserves the center of my blog as well.  Without Him in my life would be…..well….I really can’t imagine my life without Him.  Again, it’s just a thought that has been buzzing and wanted to warn you guys.

Still will be sharing my struggles with my addiction though.  I do still have those moments.  Had another tonight actually.  Again, if God hadn’t been there,  I dare try to imagine where I would have ended up tonight.  Scary.

My Tree in black and white

If I don’t seem to be talking to you as much over the next week or so, it’s not because I’m mad at you. Why should I be?  You’ve been a better friend than anyone could ask for.

It’s not because  I decided to give into my desires and have gone out on a binge. I made it through last night’s experience without a set back.  Still have “the taste” today, but it’s not over-powering.  I will admit a brief urge today, but I stopped what I was doing, squeezed God’s hand, and asked him for help.  The urge quickly subsided.  Thanks to you for your thoughts and prayers!

It’s not because I finally decided to update to WordPress 2.7 and destroyed my home here. In fact, I updated this afternoon and things went great!  My hosting service, Tubu Internet Solutions, had a very simple upgrade procedure that pretty much just required that I press a button or two to confirm I wanted to upgrade.  Then, someone there wiggled their nose, said the magic words, and TA-DA…UPGRADE!  Took all of 15 seconds to complete.  Obviously it’s not because I no longer know how to post, either.

It’s not because I’ve had enough of this blog. In fact, it almost hurts to think I’m not going to be talking with ya every night.  I love it here!  I’m having the time of my life and this is where I get to talk to you about it.  I’m going to miss you

Nope it’s not for any of that.  It’s because, I HAVE GOT to get some Christmas “stuff” done…er…started, before Christmas gets here.  I’ll be out, fighting the crowds, hoping to find those gifts that the kids are wanting.  Trying to find the perfect gift that says “I Love You” for those that I love.  But, this year, this year I’m going to be enjoying the season. It’s not really about the gifts.  It’s about happiness and love.  Don’t tell anyone (looking left and right to make sure no one is looking over my shoulder), but I’m kinda looking forward to shopping and seeing the smiles and nervous energy on everyone’s face.

I am also hoping to spend some time tidying up around my home here on blogopolis.  No drastic changes, just some cosmetic things I’m wanting to do.  Some changes to get done before the new year.

I’ll still be checking in fairly often.  I don’t think I’ll be able to stay away that long.  I’ll still be traveling around blogopolis and stopping in on you daily.  I can’t stay completely away   So, if you have a blog, and I don’t know it, shame on you.  I won’t get to visit.  If you’ve left comments, then I know where you are.  I’ll see you around.

Because of HIM

SC

First I must say, Happy Thanksgiving!  I can’t tell you how much I have looked forward to this day.  But, I digress.

Just wanted to drop a quick note about something different on The Ever-Changing Thought as of, well, now.  I have disabled requiring you to add your email address in order to leave comments.

I will have to see how well this works out.  If I start to receive a bunch of spam comments, I will most likely have to re-enable this, or add a layer of validation.  Remains to be seen.  But for now, for those that were concerned, enjoy the change.  For those that don’t care, enjoy the change anyway.

Because of Him

SC

Just wanted to jot a few lines of thanks to Oktober5.  

I have been struggling to come up with a logo for The Ever-Changing Thought for several weeks now.  Yesterday I decided to seek help.  I sent out a Tweet, and left for a movie.  When I had returned, I had my reply.  When I saw the idea, I loved it.  O5 had the idea of a thought bubble with the mathematical symbol for change in the bubble.  

I whipped up something in Photoshop and sent him a couple of results to see if that is what he had in mind.  He asked about motion blur, I added it, sent it back, and there you have it.  Up there on the right.  The new logo for The Ever-Changing Thought.

This guy can write too!  We had a big discussi….hey, why don’t you check out the article for yourself.  You won’t be disappointed!

Thanks Oktober5!

SC

photo by danprates

OK…OK…I wasn’t going to do this.  I was going to do a google search on this topic, but that yielded more information than I felt like sifting through.  Besides, I’d rather get my answer from those I trust .  

Anyway, I’ve been at this blog for a little over a month and I must say I don’t see it slowing down very much.  The directions may be straying a bit from day to day, but I feel that I’m still pulling back toward my purpose.  I don’t want this to be a blog just for a bunch of alcoholics though.  I love sharing and getting ideas and participating in these community events.  It’s…nice for lack of a better term.

I never new how much I enjoyed writing.  I may take a post or two a month and just write a little short story or something, I don’t know.  Writing though, for me, is so relaxing I feel the need to do more.  

At this point my main focus is still going to be helping whomever I can touch.  Whomever can help ME form my words.  I’m writing this for you.  I hope that you are enjoying reading it as much as I am sharing.  

OK. I’m rambling now.  To the point.

If you are a writer of any kind, I would like to know where you get your inspiration from or what preparation do you do before writing?  Do you sit and listen to music a few minutes before?  Do you meditate?  Is it something that you just sit down and do and let your mind take you where it may.  

The latter is what I feel is my inspiration a majority of the time, and I’ve got this feeling that there is something, some process, I dunno what it is.  Just a missing link.   I know I can reach out to God at anytime and be able to write about something, but i don’t want to preach all the time, if you know what I’m saying. I mean, don’t get me wrong.  I love God and the power I feel  when I’m used to carry a message from him, that to me is inspiration. I guess, I’m looking for a similar inspiration to write fiction, or a short story or just whatever I want to.  I hope I’m making sense.   

I dunno, maybe I’m doing ok and growing and it’s all part of the process.  If so, hey I’ll take it cause it’s still a lot of fun.  Am I searching too hard?   

SC

I’m guest posting over at  Butterflies in my Hand.  Kool Aid was gracious enough to ask request volunteer me to write a guest post on her blog.  (direct link to post: A Rebirth)  I guess that’s what I get for giving my pep talk about coming out of your comfort zone, and how no one volunteers for anything, you have to ask.  

Seriously.  I do appreciate her giving me this opportunity.  Another few readers to hopefully add to my list.  Another source to get my story, my word out.  It really means a lot, especially being such a “just starting out” blogger.  I am honored.

If you are here from there, thanks for stopping by.  Grab a cup of java and relax with me.  Allow me to share my life with you.  If you gots any questions, feel free to ask at any of the other posts, or you can just comment here I guess.  I’ll do my best to answer with honesty and thought. 

Again Thanks Kool Aid!

I’m sure this wonderful, well thought out, time devouring, thought/post/observation/analogy, has been tossed around the blogosphere many many times over.  But it hit me today, and has just sorta changed, ever so slightly, the way that I “look” at the blogosphere.  Personal, I think is the word I’m looking for.  Interesting is another one.  

“Where did ever come up with such a great idea, Scott?”

Well, I’m glad you asked.  

This took off from a comment/reply that I had left on cheerfulmonk.com just this morning.  Please read the whole post, but what I found…um…most interesting (not about the whole thing Jean, it was all interesting) about the comments was:

#2 Scott on 10.20.08 at 1:13 am

Sorry about that, after I re-read my last post a few more times, it sounded more like a shameless plug. Not intended.  

Scotts last blog post..The Ever-Changing Thought is..Um..Changing??

#3 Jean on 10.20.08 at 1:54 am

Scott,
Thanks for coming by. I didn’t think your first comment sounded like a shameless plug. In fact, I refer to some of my posts in comments on other people’s blogs. I don’t think of that as plugging my blogs as much as going deeper into a conversation. I encourage people to do the same here.  

I like your blog and have added it to my Live Bookmarks. 

“I didn’t think your first comment sounded like a shameless plug.”

It then hit me.  If the blogosphere is a large, striving, community (world is how I picture it actually), then each niche is a neighborhood, and in that neighborhood are individuals (tecthought.com, cheerfulmonk.com, pickthebrain.com) blogs, which make up the houses in that neighborhood.  We are free to roam from neighborhood to neighborhood, house to house, checking out all the cool stuff “they” have that we don’t have in our neighborhood, and then we take that back to our neighborhood, our homes (blogs) and improve it as well as improve the community and the blogosphere.  Very fascinating to me when I look at it from that vantage point.  

I’m new to this house, neighborhood, community, and blogosphere (turns out, I’m not liking that word so much) and I have been blessed to have been welcomed the way that I have.  I hope that I am able to contribute to the growth the way that I intend. 

“OK Scott…jeez, the point?”

Hush.  I’m getting there.  Our doors (sites) are always open to strangers passing through our communities and neighborhoods and homes.  Peeking in to our “private lives and thoughts made public” and we are all OK with that.  All that we ask is one thing from each other.  One small payment for me allowing you to enter my house, neighborhood, community freely.

“OK Scott…come on already!”

Ready for that payment?  Here is all we ask of each other. Leave a comment.  Mindboggling isn’t it. I know!   That comment is your way of saying “Hey, when you get done at Jean’s house, or Seamus’ house, or Ron’s house, your all invited to my house, my neighborhood to hang out for a while.” 

PAY IT FORWARD – That phrase is used a lot here in my “real” community as we have just went through that horrible tornado back on Feb. 5th.  My community here really grew as close as I have ever seen (and we didn’t rely on the government (shameless political view there sorry)). I hope that when the tornadoes hit our communities here in the blogosphere (there has got to be another word for that), that we can all band together and help each other rebuild their “homes.”  Help the new guys moving in get off the ground.  I’m willing to pay, help in whatever way I can.  Are you?

Jean, though it wasn’t planned, even made the same comment we make daily out there in the “real world.”

“Thanks for coming by“, she said.  Gives me chills.  A whole new perspective on this thing we call a community.

Let me help you help yourself!

SC